Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Relationships ARGGGG!!!! Why are they so difficult for us?!!!

We know we can live on our own but why do we have so much trouble
letting another in? We do it with our friends so what about other

Our minds tell us the most horrible things while our ego beats us into
submission. We end up thinking we are not worthy of a wonderful

As I have written before we need to chose our boyfriends/girlfriends
with the same qualities and discerning taste we chose our friends
with. Then we need to, we have to not run double standards. No, not
what you are thinking rather we must treat ourselves the way we treat
those we care about. We often lavish our chosen ones with so much
love and care while robbing ourselves of that same love from ourselves.

It is like we think we can't love ourselves and another at the same
time. It is like we think we are unworthy of our own care and yet
think we can care for another. Just doesn't make sense!

We confuse ourselves, build molehills into mountains and make
something simple seem so unattainable.

Simple thoughts......

You can never end up alone in a world of billions.

You don't need to settle out of fear of losing control.

Relationships are about feeling good everyday, not creating drama.

TV lies. What you see is not what you need nor what you get but for
sure you can create the drama portrayed there.

You get what you expect.

Assumptions kill a relationship.

Communication is not rocket science. Just open your mouth and speak.

Blame is never required, honesty is.

Act like a 12 year old and your relationship cannot and will not work.

If your needs are not being met, don't blame, meet them yourself. (you
are not a victim!)

If you don't know you, no one else can either, meet you, get to know
and like you.

When we fight for something we think we want it is often the idea of
it we are fighting for, never ever lead yourself down the garden path
of assumptions and expectation.

What to do what to do.....

It honestly, and I am not kidding, is simple. Put you first. You must
like you, you MUST meet your own needs, this is where it all starts.

Yes, I get it and I do know relationships seem to be frustrating,
illusive and just plain silly at times but the bottom line is if you
treat you the way you wish someone else too you will never pick
someone who treats you badly. If you allow yourself to do the things
you allow others to do while you are in a relationship with them, you
will never run a double standard and feel resentment. If you never do
anything out of obligation you will not feel like their parent nor
feel like you'll lose control and if you realize a good friend stays
forever, doesn't judge and just plain likes you, you will find the one
who can visit, the humor and the friendship that will last a lifetime.

People say when you add sex it gets complicated, but the truth is sex
is the icing on the cake or the roof on an already stable foundation.
If you are basing a relationship only on what goes on during sex, you
only have a roof with no foundation. If sex is just a bonus, then you
have the right idea.

Relationships are not complicated. We deal with our friends everyday,
so change your perception, choose not to live in the drama, grow up
and into what you know you deserve.

All my love, AuKeeRa

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