Wednesday, May 25, 2011

The ego does have a purpose and a gift ~ self doubt

I posted a video on utube today and the first comment I got was "You
realize your full of crap don't you." Yes, this comment was posted on
a video for tolerance and understanding. Interesting. Immediately I
felt the pang of self doubt. Did I do something wrong? DId I
unknowingly hurt someone? My ego flew into wanting to control and
this time I took a moment and rechecked myself.

The ego with it's self doubt allows us to think before we speak, if we
let the ego serve this purpose. The ego works from a point of right
or wrong only. If you are right, then it makes me wrong, I believe I
am right so therefore you must be wrong.

My ego wants this person to be wrong, thus I want to prove he is wrong
but how does this serve me? I do not know him, he does not know me.
Thus all I know is my view is wrong for him. This does not make my
view wrong for me.

My ego is hurt though and wants to hit back, as a child would but then
why would I purposefully hurt another just because they hurt me, thus
I temper my ego with tolerance, allowing myself to feel hurt, angry
and frustrated while letting this person be entitled to their point of
view.

Yes, this is why walking our walk is so hard and tolerance with
acceptance is really required for our time on this earth. Yes, it is
hard, I will admit that over and over but within the same breath, this
is our life and we choose what emotion we allow to lead. No one's
choice is wrong for them even though another might find it abrasive,
even hurtful. Who am I do judge someone who has judged me? I don't
even know him, nor does he know me. He is simply stating his view of
'the cup' and that it for sure doesn't match my point of view.

We are all entitled to this however we can also choose to allow this
to be our compass. What is our ego lashing out at? What self doubt
has this video (in his case) or comment (in my case) enacted within me
and what is my solution. What is right for me? How can I make me feel
better? How can I serve what works for me? In his case it was to
comment on the video enacting his self doubt, for me it was to comment
back and thank him for his opinion, then to blog about self doubt.

A wonderful woman I have recently met pointed out tonight how I use my
self doubt to ensure I see others points of view and don't knee jerk
react to the actions or comments of others. I am deeply grateful for
her insight for now I get to live her theory and see her observation
is right.

Thus I see the ego does come with a gift if we choose to use it, one
of self doubt, the doubt that can enable us to grow more understanding
into ourselves and those around us. No time wasted, no thought a
waste either.

A side note, I later found the comment was posted by a relative of
mine more tolerance is in order :)

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

when listening to yourself

Clairvoyance is not an elite gift, nor is being empathic nor
intuitive, it a human trait.

We all have gut instincts. Each and everyone of us. That instinct
come with alot of information which you may or may not pay attention
to. Most of us assume we are not able to 'read' other people when in
reality we do it everyday.

For some reason we know who we can trust and who we shouldn't. Yes,
sometime we talk ourselves into another feeling even though we knew
what the original 'feeling' was.

Sometimes people get to far into trying to listen to what they
'should' do rather than just doing. Life is living, not waiting to
make sure your decision is right. There is no true right or wrong,
there just is and you will always do your best. Don't let fear or
self threats (or opinions of others) bring fear and thus indecision on
something you feel is right for you. Indecision makes for a very
unsafe feeling this life. One person you must trust is you.

It is true we are guided everyday, by what force depends on your
belief system, however regardless of this force you are responsible
for the actions you choose. When you decide your guides, what you
listen too, the universe or internal voices 'told you to do something'
and you felt you had no choice, you must sound your own alarm bells.

You are the leader of this life. Your ego may tell you to do certain
things, along with what you think might be a guide but you must remind
yourself you are in the driver seat. You have a choice. A higher
source will never ask you to harm yourself (even by spending all your
money, eating foods that make you sick, drinking too much, gambling
with promise of winning big money or changing your body to make life
better) these are action of something inside of you which does not
accept you just the way you are. I am not stating you are not allowed
to do any of these, I am speaking in the terms of excessive behavior
only.

No other person can make you do anything either. No one. Hypnosis
cannot even manipulate you to do anything to harm you. Those who
envoke fear can make a pretty strong case to manipulate one's behavior
but this again is when we must ask ourselves what works for us. We
hold these answers, we have the gifts for us and we have our
connection to what we believe in.

There is no external force able to make us ever do anything to harm
ourselves or another.

Still it begins with you. Listen to you and you will not require
another to hear you. Take care of you and you will not try to save
the world rather you will be present in life daily.

Becoming one who listens to themselves will hear what they need, life
just becomes fuller, yes, it still includes ups and downs, all your
emotions along with good days and bad, but it now includes a
confidence that you are not alone, have what you need and are
everything you need to be.

Keep it simple and you will know what you need to, each and everyday.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Do you follow? Should you lead? Activist or passivist?

Do we need to fight for what we believe in? Should we be educating
others in our beliefs feeling they need our education and advice?
Where has fighting and activism brought us today? Has it really given
us freedom?

Does fighting really solve anything? Does it liberate those who are
fighting? How do we rise up when suppressed? All these thoughts can
just make our head spin. What is our responsibility in a first world
country? Should we defend the weak? Should we rescue? Should we go
and give aid? What should we do?

These answers are very personal ones so I will express my opinions and
views to an objective point then urge you to find your own truth.

In what I see fighting solves nothing. Take your personal life for
example. As kids we are told to walk away from bullies, as adults we
tend to stand to fight to be right. But for a fight you need two
people, right? What if only one is fighting? Well then AuKeeRa we
will be taken over! Really? Are you sure about that? In a one to
one fight, when one walks away, there can be no longer be a fight.
When in an abusive relationship one must first chose to walk away from
the fight then be strong enough to care for themselves learning to see
fighting to be right with someone who will always think you are wrong
can not ever be worth it.

I do firmly and strongly we must have our personal beliefs and find
the mindset behind our actions is what truly is important. If we are
called within ourselves to aid another but KNOW we are not saving
them, then we are operating in a way of equal mindset. This means I
am giving to you because I know you need it right now but I do not
think you are needing or in need of saving (and I am also hoping if I
am ever in the same place someone will know to aid me). This
alleviates the ego taking over and deciding the other person 'needs'
us and our good work. This also keeps our understanding clear that we
are not responsible for this person, nor the final outcome as they are
living their life and we must also live ours.

Yes, it is hard when it comes to charity, but again, mindset is where
it is at. If you know the person you are helping doesn't really need
you and is where they are right now and capable of what they need to
be, you keep what you believe in at the forefront, knowing all others
are taken care of as well. Unfortunately our world feels we need to
save others, not realizing we are all equal, where we need to be and
furthermore capable. We must see all countries, societies and people
as capable. Our equals. It is only your mindset your are responsible
and only you know what view is right for you. You are the only one
who can lead you.

So before you march, fight, donate, be passive, or even vote or help a
friend, make sure your mindset is clear. Journal, take time, make
sure you are NOT acting out of guilt, or doing it because you think
you should or are suppose to, know what and why you are doing it for
you. Be clear this feels right for you. Do not feel you need to
fight or prove your point to anyone. If you are solid in your actions
and your choice you will not feel the need to defend and if you do
share it won't be out of need to get others on board with you or to
prove you are right to them. You will feel good, balanced and right
within your actions.

As I said in my last few blogs, we must feel good and right for
ourselves. When we feel good with our choices we just feel good.
When we work out of obligation or guilt we will begin to resent what
we are doing. Just observe yourself. Keep a pulse on how you are
feeling and if or when things no longer feel right, allow yourself to
move those things out of your life. You do not ever need to justify
your actions to another when they are right for you.

Thus Do we need to fight for what we believe in? Fighting sometime
will come into play but you will know when it is right for you to do
and then it will be right. You will also know if it is not right for
you and you will walk away.

Should we be educating others in our beliefs feeling they need our
education and advice? Sure we can share what we believe in but no one
really needs are unsolicited education or advice as they are our
equals, have their own beliefs and none of us like unsolicited advice.

Where has fighting and activism brought us today? Some believe it has
gotten us to where we are while others believe we have not moved that
far so Has it really given us freedom? I think freedom is more of a
mindset than an actual reality, all I know is I feel freedom in my
life but all I know is my life as all you know is yours, so you will
know how to find your freedom and opinion of it.

Does fighting really solve anything? Two people will never agree when
opposing views are presented thus fighting solves nothing. However
when we work to put ourselves in someone else's shoes and work to see
their point of view it can give us an understand but we still NEVER
need to agree with them or think their views are right for us. Also
when two adults fight nothing is solved however when they work with
solution oriented conversation, understanding and compassion, results
can be achieved. In reference war you must decide this for yourself.
Does it liberate those who are fighting? Again, you must decide this
for yourself. How do we rise up when suppressed? I know for fact when
we are feeling repressed in our lives our mindset must be what we look
to. Look at even the extreme examples in life, those who have been
prisoners against their will, suppressed beyond imagination and there
are countless examples of these people leading wonderful lives.
Suppression can always be overcome via your mindset first. What on
earth do you mean AuKeeRa! Have you ever heard the phrase "Why does
the caged bird sing? Because it doesn't know it is caged" there are
people in this world who have everything they could ever ask for and
they still feel suppressed, then there are those who are held by law,
who are in a situation where they cannot fight back and these people
rise time and time again to become beautiful individuals who love
themselves and do not blame or hate anyone. They move past their
situation and allow themselves to live, not stay stuck in hate, or the
fight.

What is our responsibility in a first world country? Again, you will
know if you feel called and where you need to be. Should we defend
the weak? Remember no one is truly weak and if you KNOW you are to
intervene (not save) you will do what is right for you at that time.
Should we rescue? No one needs rescuing but sometimes we all need a
little help, again trust yourself and you will know how to help and
when as long as you ask yourself, examine your beliefs and are sure
you are doing it because it feels right for you and not out of
obligation or guild. Should we go and give aid? Again, trust
yourself, your beliefs, allow those beliefs to grow and change as you
do. Be your own leader, don't be a passivist in your own mind, work
to balance your thoughts. Take the time to ask you, examine your
beliefs, standing up for ourselves means being strong enough to do
what is right for ourselves not through harming others purposefully,
fighting, bullying or getting others to follow or walk with it. We
don't have to fight to be who we are, we just need to accept
ourselves, listen to ourselves and live our life via our actions and
not our voice. (walk the walk, not just talk the talk:)

AuKeeRa Rayne
www.aukeera.com