Thursday, October 24, 2013

Bullying ~ one solution

Parents want to stop bullying. We all do... So when does the open and
honest dialogue begin about how bullying begins? Everyday people
berate and bully themselves in their heads. Not policing their
thoughts one but. Then they all cry out when they hear younger
generations torture others verbally with words.

How are those words different from those we as adults say to ourselves?

When does this society learn that what we think of ourselves we
inadvertently pass onto younger generations?

When will the adults of this world take responsibility for thinking
the way they'd like to see others in the younger generations act?

Your thoughts are the key to end bullying. The thoughts you decide to
give yourself rather than the ones you hear from yourself each and
every moment of each day.

You disagree? Tell me honestly if you like yourself enough to walk
away from a fight of any kind.

You think you have to stand up for yourself or teach someone they are
wrong. Why?

This is what we are teaching out younger generations. Not to be
accepting but to be right and furthermore to win or 'be on top' or 'be
the best'.

Why do we think this will take the world in a direction of
synchronicity? Has it done that for you?

What would your world be like if you accepted yourself. Just the way
you were, are and will be. Would that one thought of acceptance enable
you to accept others rather than trying to save, change or argue with
them?

Would that one thought of self-acceptance not teach other generations
to accept themselves so they too may accept others?

Change does not occur from fighting. Change comes from knowing we are
enough and deserve to have it all, just as all others do, while not
deciding what another's 'having it all' looks like to them.

Change to bullying and all the craziness in this world starts with one
thing and one thing alone. You accepting you and knowing you are
enough a d being brave enough to tell yourself that each day and
choosing to believe it.

Will we as a society understand the change our personal self-
acceptance can make? I don't know.

People prefer to be self-loathing and self-victimizing, while feeling
we cannot all be equal or that makes us less somehow, and we must find
success before anyone else!

Now add in a world that supports our self destructive thinking with
the religions say we are born sinners (unlovable or imperfect yet the
Bible states we are created in God's image) now the latest
spirituality trend decides we all need fixing (we are born sprit then
die returning to spirit, being human does not make us less) and on top
of all that, our society has us believing success requires us to be in
financial debt so we sink ourselves financially to succeed. Our whole
society is based on spend more save more! That makes no sense. We are
taught we NEED things that are only wants. We are also taught now to
live way beyond our means so no one will think we are not successful.
This trend is only twenty years old when we joined America's lead by
spending more than we make and now our seniors have joined this trend.
When we are in debt we feel horrible about ourselves and we feel
victimized and resentful forgetting we chose the things we purchased
due to pressure we believe is real.

So I honestly don't know if people are able to find self-acceptance
for themselves. Everything in this world has made it appear that we
should not accept ourselves with a plethora of reasons why we suck.

This generation comes along and all of a sudden we wonder why people
and kids bully. All the blame gets placed on actions and no one yet
has though where this behavior is started and perpetuated.

As long as we all choose to only bully ourselves each day and not
balance those thoughts with self-acceptance we are not practicing the
change we hope to see. Self-acceptance does not come with accolades or
praise in fact it after comes with frustration of 'always being the
bigger person' or 'how come I'm living in integrity when no one else
seems to be'?! This is why very few choose to accept themselves as
enough.

Once we open this door and truly believe it will you suddenly be rich
with everything you've ever wanted? No. Life will still give you
experiences requiring your full range of human emotions, something
that can only happen when you are alive. So why accept myself? It'll
just make me lazy (when we are lazy it's usually because fear
failing). It'll make me narcissistic! (Actually the state human beings
live in now is already narcissistic. When we believe we can save
others or that others 'need us' it's out ego telling us we are better
than them. We are not. Self-acceptance allows us to step back and
empower others... And our children with a loving thought of "I know
you can make it through this. I believe in you.")

No one is saying you have to as remember, self-acceptance really seems
to have no pay off and for your ego it doesn't. So I'm sure most who
read this will simply make excuses why they can't rather than adding a
thought of self acceptance to their daily existence such as "I'm proud
of you", "I love you", "you are enough" as it's just the way we are
raised and aided by the society we are living in.

But I can tell you, each and every moment of each and everyday I will
look in that mirror and tell that girl I love her, how beautiful she
is, how much I accept her and in turn each person I say it to will for
a glimmer see it in themselves as I see this in me. And furthermore my
child will learn why he is enough, how to balance self individuals
with self acceptance, how to walk out in this world amongst all the
bullies, stupidity and cruelty while still being able to see the value
of his human existence and everyone else's as well.

I ask you share this if you believe in it. Do not change my words or
erase my name, for unless you practice though of self-acceptance the
concept is truly not an easy one to explain.

It is my hope that one day you will look in the mirror and see the
perfection and beauty I see in each person I meet and in turn you will
be able, once you accept yourself as enough, begin to see your life
and everyone in it, not as a threat but also as enough. There would be
no more room for bullies in a society, as they would only be fighting
with themselves. This simple yet seemingly difficult concept is truly
the only way to stop bullying in our children, our work places and in
generations to come.

Please share if it feels right, and add in one thought today. Do not
look for outward support as only you can find this love for you. No
one can make you accept you; this journey is yours and yours alone.
You are enough you can do this.

AuKeeRa Rayne