Saturday, April 30, 2011

personal beliefs, need for others acceptance and permission, assumptions

We do not need to lead another nor do we need to follow. We will
observe, see what works for us, make it our own then live according to
those personal beliefs. Sure those beliefs will grow, change and
evolve as different experiences pass through our lives.

Our knowledge is the same as everyone else's just customized to our
lives and experiences to aid us in where we are going. This is why we
cannot teach nor really learn from another. Absolutely other people
ways and ideas influence what works for us but it is what we see
working for them and what they may talk about we listen too. When
another person tells us what they think we need to do, think or
believe (or we do this same thing to them) we are operating in ego and
self centeredness deciding the other person won't find the answers we
did on their own. Who made us all knowing and them not?

I often hear other people say (and honestly I used to say it too) that
he or she is 'not getting it' or 'just not there yet' until I learned,
maybe they are not ever meant to know that or live it. Maybe, just
maybe, the other person has all the knowledge and experiences they
need and for them it is enough. Maybe I need to just be quiet and
accept everyone else's life is enough for them as my life is enough
for me.

But what about when we are asked for our opinion and advice? Then by
all means give it. However do not give it in the way of thinking
yours is right and theirs is wrong. Present your facts, opinions,
beliefs and advice in understanding it is what works for you and they
may take all of it, none of it and always hope they change it to suit
them and not just take your words then attempt to just make these
thoughts their own.

We don't have other's answers, but we can give another view and this
can aid another in finding their own way. After all we are all equal
and capable.

If someone says, I am lost, I need you, remember, it is not you they
need, it is themselves. Speak in knowing this and do not try to save
another who does not need saving.

None of us like unsolicited advice. Nobody. No one likes to have
their beliefs or faith challenged, and no one should do this to
another, for faith is personal so if you do not want yours challenged
do not lay it out for acceptance or examination by another. Sometimes
we are unsure of what we belief so we seek acceptance from another
however we are often met with correction or objection finding our
newly found belief not strong enough to withstand another scrutiny
thus our ego comes out to fight, defend and protect. We turn on the
ones we just asked for their opinion deciding 'how dare they don't
agree with me and what I believe!'

Faith is personal. Personal beliefs are personal. We do not need
another persons acceptance nor permission to believe what works for
us. If it works for us it works, it does not need to be talked about
nor shared as just because it works for us does not mean it will work
for another and remember unsolicited advice is never wanted, needed or
desired.

When we do not explain ourselves, yes, it leave us open to other
people's assumptions and perceptions. This leads us to believe we
need to prove ourselves, thus we willingly tend to open ourselves up
to scrutiny while trying to prove what we believe or do works! If you
live what you believe and do not speak it (walk the walk rather than
talk it) it will never matter what another thinks of you or what they
assume you believe as your life will work for you.

If you need another's insight, opinion, or advice then find those you
trust and ask. Always know not to layer another's thoughts over yours
but find what works for you and fit those parts in to what is already
working for you and shift what isn't.

Yes, life is trial and error but overall it is a once in a lifetime
experience every single moment and you are always doing your best in
that moment.

AuKeeRa Rayne
www.aukeera.com

No comments: